Without it all, who are you really?

When I was seven I really wanted a Furby.

Want is an understatement. I couldn't wait a month for my birthday because all the kids in school already had one. Even when I was crying in the middle of the toy store my parents still wouldn't budge (good on em). Afterwards we drove to Taco Bell and in my furious state I locked myself in the car and refused to go in. Again my parents left me in there and didn't fuss (god they really were good). My protest lasted only twenty minutes but I was pretty proud of myself. Damn those delicious Tacos.

If you're wondering yes, I was a stinking brat for half of my childhood. I even had a singlet to prove it. It said 'Daddy's Little Brat'. But that's another story.

I whinged and moaned for that Furby for weeks.  I finally got it on my birthday, only to then put it down after five days and move onto the next thing. 

It wasn’t really what I wanted. It was just what everyone else had. It all started with a shitty advertisement that fooled me into believing I needed a fluffy bird that talked to have a better childhood.

It was the worst $80 my parents ever spent. They still won’t let me live it down.

When I was sixteen my hair was a mousey blonde colour. At the time I thought I looked like a schmuck. I used to flip through magazines and see pictures of models with white blonde hair and was captivated by their stunningness. I would also get jealous of girls at school that had perfectly blonde locks that had all of the boys fixated on them.

So what did I do? I bought a $13.95 Schwarzkopf blonde hair dye box and tried to do my own hair. Worst of all it was the first day back at school and low and behold - my hair was bright orange/yellow. Epic fail. If I wasn't already enough of a dork, my chances of any boy fixating themselves on me were even slimmer.

How many times have you been tried to upgrade yourself, only to turn around and realise it's not satisfying at all? Or end up feeling shit about it because it's not YOU at all?

Don't get me wrong, it's perfectly okay to 'want' certain things in life that bring us joy. Get the beautiful dress, go to the fancy restaurant or have the luxe holiday.

But what I'm asking is if all of this was taken away from you, would you still be satisfied to sit with yourself?

Because that's true happiness.

My point here is don't let the media tell you that you need to upgrade yourself to become a better person. Don't allow bullshit advertisements tell you that you aren't enough and need to have this and that. Don't let the world rob you of feeling good exactly as you are.

You don't need the latest gadgets to keep up with the crowd.

You don't need to buy the latest products in order to look better.

You don't need fame to be respected.

You don't need to lose weight to be loved.

You don't need make-up to be considered beautiful.

You don't need barbie blonde hair just because everyone else has it. 

I mean seriously, in twenty years time would you rather look back and say -

‘I’m so glad I valued my shoes, my dress, my phone, my hair my title and my Instagram pics?’

Or would you rather say, 

‘I’m so glad I valued my integrity, self-worth, authenticity, defining moments, adventures and creativity?’ 

With that being said, I tend to do things a little differently than I used to now.

I spend money on good times with friends rather than buying a ridiculous amount of clothes. 

I write about stuff that really matters to me, instead of what will get me more followers.

I prefer walking on the beach than walking around a shopping centre.

I care less about being a people pleaser, and enjoy being selfish with my life choices.

I work in a coffee shop despite people's comments that it's not a 'real job'.

I've swapped tight and extremely uncomfortable bandage dresses that stick to your arse, for beautiful flattering dresses that make me feel good. And for half the price.

I don't care if a place is Instagram worthy, I just want to go to places that inspire me to be the best version of myself.

I don't wear makeup everyday, and I'm okay leaving my house like that.

Because at the end of the day you can have it all, but the world is just going to keep telling you to upgrade yourself. 

And to sum it all up, I actually like myself now more than ever because I don't buy this bullshit anymore. Because it feels fucking invigorating to be yourself. 

So instead of wondering what your next online purchase will be, your hair colour, or what looks good on paper, I ask you this....

Are you brave enough to distinguish what you really want even if it goes against others? 

Are you willing to rebel societal standards in order to be true to yourself? Your soul?

Can you source your own happiness from your presence? 

Are you smart enough to rise above the things we’re told we must have or do in order to be respected or liked?

Do any of the above and you might actually just fall in love with yourself. For real.